FOURTEEN

i have this strange feeling. i'm excited n' @ the same time I'm kinda afraid...
i dont really think afraid is the phrase.
i think i'm ________ (choose whichever word you wanna add there).

It's like when you go on a blind date.
you've heard about the person, someone has set you up for the date, and you're all confident and ready to go. however, when you are opening the door of the restaurant where you're gonna meet your date, you freeze. you just dont want to do it. you think it's a mistake. you think you're gonna get hurt. you think tons of things.

in a way, it's what i feel right now.
in 2 thursdays, around 10am i'll be seeing my brother in flesh and bones, for the 1st time, after 7 years, 10 months and 5 days of not seeing him. I dont remember waving goodbye to him when i was in EZE and i dont remember much of that time. but i was 22, he was 23 and though he was dating Mariana, he wasnt a dad... he was still living @ home. it's all different now from way back then.

i'm afraid i'm not gonna have enough $.
i'm afraid things dont go the way i want them to go...
i'm afraid of many things.

*******************

Ryan came to my room this morning (he does that every day) and he came into my bed and cuddle with me. He was talking and talking and talking and talking. At 6am!
WHY??? I still had 20 more minutes to sleep.
he's sweet though. just for a little while.


You all have a wonderful day.
Good luck with the essay D!