Noelia...

Every year, on Dec 20th, I remember that something important happened.
Not only did my high school crush (for about 7 years) get married, but I got baptized. I remembered it because it was a joyful moment. It's a treasure memory. May be the only one I have from when I was a little girl.
I don't remember what year exactly, but it was a long time ago.

Some bloggers have been written letters to themselves. Some of them do it to their old self. Some of them do it to the future self. I did it to my 'present' self. Because it's such an important day forme I'll share it with you.

Dear Noelia…

Twenty years ago (or so) you walked down those 5 steps and, holding your older brother’s hand, you got baptized. You decided to give your life to the Lord. May be that’s the only happy memory you still have of your grandfather. But that day, Dec 20th 1987 or 1988, marked the beginning of your walk with Jesus.

You’ve walked a long way and I’m really proud of you for the things you accomplished thru your life. I’m happy of the things you accomplished in this 2007. Not all of them, but some of them. You achieve some of your goals, and that was important.

I would like for you to look back at how you keep making the same mistakes, always choosing the same wrong people to be friends with, and how those mistakes affect your present life. You always hang out with the wrong people, just because you don’t wanna be alone. What you don’t realize is that being alone is not that bad. You know that. You’ve lived with few friends. So don’t be afraid to be without friends. Those few you have are good enough. They love you. They care about you. Listen to them. Pay attention to their advice. Don’t be so stubborn sometimes and listen to what they have to tell you. You know they love you and they want the best for you. Just open your ears –and your heart- to them.

I wish you could move on and fall out of love with HIM.
I know how much you love him and I know deep down in your heart you want him to love you the same way you do, but to tell you the truth… you’re just lying to yourself and you’re wasting your time with a guy who’s not worth your love. You know that. I know you don’t give up so easily on love. You fight for the people you love and even if it takes everything out of you, you’re gonna just stick by them.
Don’t be afraid of rejection.
Kiss him if you want to.
Tell him how much you love him -not only via txt msg.
Look him in the eyes and tell him how you feel.
Don’t wait forever for him… It’s not worth it.

Stop talking to your ex fiancee.
He’s a guy who literally B.R.O.K.E. your heart. Why are you still talking to him? Why do you care what he does with his life? What does he care if you date or not? He proposed to you over the phone, he told you he didn’t love you, and he tried to get you back when he knew you were with someone else.
Just STOP TALKING TO HIM.

I know you’re a sweet person. You are a person to love, to be friends with.
Don’t spoil that with that ‘New York’ attitude you’re having right now. Being angry and bitchy won’t take you anywhere. Bring your Texas attitude back. Forget. Forgive. Be kind. Loving. Patient.
Think at how your mom does things, and how much happier her life is.

You’re not Bank Of America Noe.
Stop lending money. Learn from the past... PLEASE!!!
Get back the thousands of dollars your friends owe you.
Please!!!! I beg you. Learn to say NO.

Remember who you wanted to be. What you want to be. Who you are. Remember where you came from. Don’t forget the simple things you were taught.
Don’t forget the Cross, Noelia.
Don’t EVER forget the Cross.

Love yourself. Take care of yourself.
Stop ruining your mind with bad things.
Take time to read. Good things...not garbage.

I guess that's all... I should tell you some other things, but they're all the same like live, love, laugh... but I know you're in the path to change those things that are not doing any good on you.

Be happy Noelia. Be happy.

Have a good Christmas and a happy 2008. You deserve it!
Love you always....
Noelia :)

It's actually kinda hard to write to yourself coz you have to be honest. But it's good. You always find something that you can take from what you say to yourself.
Ya'll have a great day!!!